because you’re worth it
Yellow friends! Longer read today so get comfy. It’s super worth it for the jam session at the end though! It’s a doozy!
I just want to flash back to the Get Smooshy post for a sec where we established the idea that talking to ourselves gentlycan change how we are feelingin a “high-stress” moment. And over time, ultimately change the relationship we have with ourselves… Gentle self-talk is one healthy way we can self soothe and get ourselves through one farked hectic moment and into a new (hopefully shinier) moment.
We have established WHY this is useful. But alone, this may sound wishy-washy or lame…or maybe even impossible. That self-critic can be conniving and loud! I feel you! So…I want to discuss the HOW, right now, brown cow! Ok, not RIGHT now…but I’m putting together a Self-Soothing Series that’ll break that shit down!
I thought this process might be the clearest broken down into micro tasks. NOT because it’s complex. But simple, doesn’t mean easy. If you’re keen to give it a crack, nailing one part at a time will be the likeliest way to make it stick! Just like any other life skill we develop. And I assure you from personal experience, this life skill can be l-l-l-life changing.
You might have a “deeerrrrrrr” response to this series. Please know that I’m purposely slowing us down phenomenally for this one. I 1000% (that is not a typo) understand the feeling of urgency and impatience associated with just wanting my overwhelm to F off!
“Give me the magic answer to dominating this fucking pain right now, yesterday, at the time of birth, asshole!!!!”
But the only way that I found some sweet relief was rolling up my sleeves and taking small baby steps towards my actual self. I now so appreciate and understand the significance of mindfulness around this process. You not only learn a shit tonne about yourself…but it’s a glorious gift that keeps on giving. Eventually you won’t even notice you’re doing it.
Gross, sounds like effort?
All the greatest things worth doing aremy friends! And you are beyond worthy!
Take a second…think about the last creative project you worked on…
- You would of needed to brainstorm the idea in some way
- Figure out what the project is
- How the idea will work
- What or who you need to bring it all together
- What the intention of the work is
- What the work will feel, look, sound like
- Organise your thoughts and make an action plan
- Bring your whole self to the work to ensure it is everything you originally imagined (or more)
- Reflect on the work as you’re going
- Think about what is and isn’t working and adjust accordingly.
- Then after the work is complete, take what you learnt during that project and implement it into the next. (Due to this, the work actually lives forever enriching and forming other ideas and concepts. And the wheel continues to turn baby!)
Well…It could be helpful to view the Self-Soothing Series (or yourself in general) as a work of art. Just like your work, YOU are worth slowing down for. You are worth reflecting on, putting in the extra time, spending energy on, handling carefully, listening to, expressing, figuring out what works and what doesn’t. At the end of the day, the work you put into YOU will only benefit your projects. As well as those who have the privilege of experiencing your projects. Bless your creative souls!
This is a jam session, so it’s time for the fuuuuuuunnn stuff….
I have a super cool exercise that could be interesting to try if you’re game! Think of it as a warm-up to the Self-Soothing Series.
- Find a relatively quiet space to hang out alone (haha nerd!)
- Set a timer for 10 minutes
- Out loud (yes it’ll feel weird, but roll with it dude) start stating all the things you are aware of. Use the phrase… “I am aware of….” every single time you state something new.
For example: “I am aware of a sharp pain in my right shoulder” “I am aware of the bright sun in my eyes” “I am aware of tingly pain in my eyes” “I am aware of tired eyes” “I am aware I feel tired” “I am aware of dirty shoes sitting in the corner of the room” “I am aware I feel cranky about that” “I am aware of my tightened jaw when I think about it” “I am aware of my thoughts”
- Continue on for the full 10 minutes following your awareness. You might feel tempted to start saying “I am aware that…” The word ‘that’ takes you out of yourself and increases focus on things external to you. So if you start saying ‘that’ try and bring yourself back to ‘of’.
- When the time is up I would thoroughly encourage you to sit and reflect about the exercise. What did you notice? How did it feel? How do you feel different now, compared to before you started? If anything, what did you find challenging? Did you learn anything new about yourself?
That’s it! We just want to practice noticing ourselves and what is going on for us. It sounds simple, but the time may feel draaaaaaggy! Commit to yourself and stick with it. Self-awareness is a life-long process so don’t beat yourself up if you find it challenging. That is simply another thing to be aware of.
Pumped to hear your experiences folks! Because you’re worth it!
Stay tuned for the Self-Soothing Series…coming soon to a blog near you! (THIS blog, it’s coming to this blog. Thumbs up!)